What a difference a year makes... or is it two? Actually, it's two and a half (or 30 months) since my wife first marched in to my backyard in the middle of Summer, leaned over me as I sat drinking a beer in my favorite lawn chair, and said: "Your boys can swim!" Now, it might have been the beer, or possibly the heat, but something made me lose consciousness at that moment. Maybe it was vertigo? Maybe it was a natural gas leak? Or maybe, I was poisoned? Nope… it was the prospect of fatherhood. Talk about your panic attacks…
Fatherhood: how the hell did that happen? Well, I know how it happened, but who gets “pregnant” (see: successfully inseminates their wife) on their first try? Well (upon further investigation) me, and every other male member of my family. It’s a family gift, one that, apparently, no one talks about (e.g. Teenwolf). Sure, I agreed to “try” for a baby, but in my mind “try” meant having sex numerous times (365) before anything took. So you can imagine my surprise.
And there I was dumbfounded, trying to wrap my head around this new information my brain was attempting to absorb. I was going to be a father. I mean, sure, it was an inevitability- sooner or later my Peter Pan Complex was going to battle it out with Father Time and I was going to be a dad- but I fought it as long as I could. Now the reality set in, and it was as scary a prospect as any.
Did I think I’d make a horrible dad? No. But, that’s not to say my role models for this all important “job” weren’t wanting. There was my own father, who, well, we don’t talk about. And my first step father, who, well, we talk even less about. There was my grandfather on my Dad’s side, who was an awesome Grandfather, but based on his failures in raising my dad I’m not sure I’d say he did a stellar job as a parent. So where did that leave me? Oddly enough, with my older brothers, two people who had no more guidance in this arena than I, but seemed to have taken the bull by the horns and mastered their new-found roles as “dads” quite handily. And that was all the inspiration I needed.
So, here I am two and a half years later, a dad, a blogger, a role model (I use the term loosely) to other first-time fathers just learning the ropes of this most amazing of journeys, and there’s nowhere else I would rather be. It’s been 12 months since I assumed the name “Fodder 4 Fathers”- food for thought on all issues father related- and embraced the idea that the evil that you know is much easier to handle than the evil that you don’t (or was it “chance favours the prepared mind/the more you know the better prepared you will be?”). It’s been a pleasure to watch it grow, along with my daughter (now 22-months-old). We have picked up many friends and fans and regular followers along the way (dads, moms, grandparents, parenting experts/professionals, etc.) that appreciate our honest, sometimes humorous, look at the trials and tribulations of being a dad, and we appreciate the hell out of each and every one of you.
Tomorrow is a new day, a new chapter, a new year to celebrate, and we hope to share it with all of you and the many new parents who will find their way to our humble little blog, looking for a glimpse in to their future. To me, parenting is a way of life; a life I stumbled (no I wasn’t drunk) in to, but one I now embrace with the kind of child-like wonderment my daughter has for each and every new experience that gets thrown my way. I hope we’ll take this journey together for many years to come.
A happy and healthy New Year to you and yours. May 2012 bring you nothing but prosperity and joy (or bundles of joy). And, here’s to another Year of the Dad!
- FODDER 4 FATHERS
Scene From "Three Men and a Baby"
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