FODDER UP! PART XI: NEW DADS- GET YOUR HEAD IN THE GAME - FACING YOUR FEARS OF FATHERHOOD

Image from "The Waterboy"

Perception is everything. If you believe in yourself you can do almost anything. But if you don't, you're doomed for failure from the very start. However, when it comes to fatherhood, you don't have the luxury of self-doubt. You're in it to win it. Every second of every day you're the quarterback and the game's on the line. No handing off the ball either, because, sometimes, it's just better to be "the man" and take one home for the team. It's time to perform like a champion, and the pressure's on you. What are YOU gonna do? Are you going to let your wife arm chair quarterback your relationship with your child, or are you going to take the ball and run with it to glory?

It's time to Fodder Up! This week's installment: Helping New Dads Manage the Emotional Roller Coaster that is Fatherhood . It's a game of respect, and you've gotta earn it... every inch of the way.

Look we all know no one expects much from a rookie, and it's up to YOU to prove yourself. You have to show that you have the mental toughness and the stick-to-it-iveness to get the job done, or you might as well just run home and cry to your Mama. No one expects a New Dad to survive the first night in the hospital, let alone the first six months or even the first year, but you can prove all the naysayers wrong by giving it your all; digging deep and finding the strength within yourself to pull yourself together and make your contribution count. There is no "I" in team, so you better leave your attitude at the door and learn to suck up your pride. You're a dad now, and all eyes are on you to be the hero in this game we call a new life.

Here's what you need to succeed:

1) A GAME PLAN:

No man is equipped to take the mental and physical brow beating of first-time fatherhood, but there are several things you can do to prepare yourself to take the hits and keep coming back for more:

i) Read the playbook:

• What to Expect The First Year - THE MANUAL FOR SUCCESS!

ii) Talk to the Veterans:

•  Dad Blogs- read, learn, interact, get support

iii) Practice:

• Dad Anti-Natal Groups/Classes - Find one in your area

2) FOCUS:

Parenting well means keeping your eye on the prize, and resolving yourself to never waiver, and do everything it takes to take that football (the baby you're cradling in your arms) to the endzone (college, marriage, success). The second you lose focus, the whole game plan goes to sh@#, and it's your job to make sure that doesn't happen.

i) Player Relations:

• Marriage Counsellors,
• Counseling for New Dads

ii) Stress Management:

• Postpartum Depression in Dads,
• Home/Work Dilemmas

iii) Learning Your Strengths:

• The Importance of Fathers

3)  A DRIVE TO SUCCEED:

The old "college try" doesn't amount to a "hill of beans" when it comes to raising your kids. Do you have the guts to go all the way? Are you in it to win it, or just going through the motions? That is what you're going to find out. If you ask me, you don't have guts until you're elbow deep in diarrhea, covered in puke, and rocking a colicky baby back to sleep for the fourth night in a row with no end in sight. But you have to find it in you to be more machine than man, and that's what wins the game! Society doesn't think you can do it, but your teammates (your wife and child) are counting on you. The clock is ticking. Get in there and make it happen!

i) Surmounting your obstacles:

•  Challenges Facing New Dads

ii) Overcoming you fears:

•  Dispelling the Fears of First-time Fathers

iii) Exceeding your own expectations:

• 100 Ways to Be a Better Dad

You have the tools. You have the will. And you have the determination. Now, go and  fight for your right to be on that field! And, don't take sh@# from anybody (no really, tell your wife to stick that dirty diaper in the Diaper Genie herself).

Show everyone, your wife, your parents, her parents, society, and, most importantly, your child, that you're the man they all "hoped" you would be.

Disclaimer: This post is intended to help new dads find the resources they need to become better fathers. Fodder 4 Fathers merely provides third party links as examples and thus leaves it up to the reader's discretion as to which information they choose to trust and incorporate in to their lives. As such, Fodder 4 Father's will not be held liable for any information provided by third party links and the information they provide.