Hello and welcome to a strange new world. You have traveled far through the desert, only to be met time and again by one empty oasis after another. You are lost and alone, wandering, wondering if someone, anyone, knows how you feel. And just when you think you can't go on, and no one could possibly understand your struggle, a hand reaches out to you, lifts you to your feet, and carries you to the promised land. He feeds you knowledge, shelters you from the self-righteous (and the ridiculous), and provides you with the tools you need to survive in this brave new world. You are a stranger in a strange land, but you are not alone. Let him be your guide. Follow closely as you travel together on this adventure of a lifetime. For now, you are a foreigner to "Fatherhood" but soon YOU will be the master of this realm.

"No Man is Expendable!"

This is Fodder 4 Fathers...


"Here! I smell a weapon of mass destruction coming on..."

Burping is an art form. Any eleven-year-old boy that can't burp the alphabet (forwards and backwards) is either not practicing hard enough, or asthmatic. But babies, well that's another story. Newborns especially need the help of a caring parent: you - the responsible, capable, exceptional father that you are (yes, I mean YOU, the guy who is trying not to make eye contact...with a computer screen). So stop trying to hand your kid off to your wife, or your mom, or some great, great aunt with rheumatism and a severe, Bette Davis style, case of the "shakes"- if it's your kid, it's your job. So grab yourself a burp cloth and a baby (preferably yours) and let's learn all about our topic of the day: burping.

Okay... now, let's see that with a real baby- not something made out of the same material they use to make Jenna Jamison's mail order body parts...

Much better. Now, did you see how she did that? It's easy. It's so easy, even this guy can do it, and he couldn't even find the lens on the camera...

Still unsure about what to do, here's some links:


And so ends our tutorial on burping... tune in next week for another new and "exciting" topic!
For now, just enjoy this last video...still on the topic of burping, of course.

No comments:

Post a Comment