Hello and welcome to a strange new world. You have traveled far through the desert, only to be met time and again by one empty oasis after another. You are lost and alone, wandering, wondering if someone, anyone, knows how you feel. And just when you think you can't go on, and no one could possibly understand your struggle, a hand reaches out to you, lifts you to your feet, and carries you to the promised land. He feeds you knowledge, shelters you from the self-righteous (and the ridiculous), and provides you with the tools you need to survive in this brave new world. You are a stranger in a strange land, but you are not alone. Let him be your guide. Follow closely as you travel together on this adventure of a lifetime. For now, you are a foreigner to "Fatherhood" but soon YOU will be the master of this realm.

"No Man is Expendable!"

This is Fodder 4 Fathers...

Fodder of the Week: Is it Possible to Predict Adult Attractiveness from Infancy?

If you've ever read the classic tale of The Ugly Duckling, you'll remember that you should never judge a book by its cover- especially when genetics are involved. Some creatures are just predestined to look more graceful, more exotic, more streamlined than others, while the rest of us, well, we're just not so lucky. But looks can be deceiving even from a very young age considering all creatures (mammals for the sake of this argument), big and small, go through some kind of metamorphosis between infancy and adulthood. And in that big box of chocolates we call life, you never do know what you're gonna get.

So the question is: are attractive babies destined to be attractive adults while the parents of ugly babies are destined to shell out a lot of money for rhinoplasty, orthodontists and laser hair removal? I'm not so sure. And, here's why... I've watched a lot of television growing up, and if casting agents (professionals that get paid a lot of money to find cute kids who will hopefully remain that way through puberty) can't predict attractiveness, who the hell can? Lets go off the list: Tina Yothers (Family Ties)? Nope. Mayim Bialik (Blossom)? Nope. That kid that played Stephanie Tanner on Full House? Nope. They were all cute kids, but, man, puberty, adolescence, and I hate to say, adulthood have not been so kind. What about the boys: Emmanuel Lewis (Webster)? Nope. Gary Coleman (Diff'rent Strokes)? Nope. That kid that played Steve Erkel (Family Matters)? Nope. And don't even get me started about some of the kids from The Brady Bunch, The Facts of Life, or The Cosby Show. Yesh.

True, in the history of film and television there have been some standouts- Alyssa Milano (Who's The Boss): cute kid, smoking hot adult; Natalie Portman (Beautiful Girls), never skipped a beat; Soliel Moon Frye (Punky Brewster); and Nicole Eggert (Charles in Charge), who grew into a beautiful woman, if only to have recently let her looks wane. But they are the exception to the rule. Even Drew Barrymore (E.T.: The Extra-Terrestrial) one of the cutest kids to ever grace the silver screen has teetered back and forth between hot and not in adulthood. So what does this say about your kids?

Well, every parent, no matter how hopeful, must realize that just because your kid came out of the womb looking like roses there's a solid chance they may not stay that way through adolescence. And that works both ways. Yes, there are many documented cases of ugly kids becoming ghastly looking adults (Clint Howard, Dustin Diamond, and that kid that played Kelly in the original Bad News Bears), but there are just as many cases of kids pulling through an ugly childhood to become stunningly symmetrical adults (although I can't think of any).

So what can we conclude from all of this? Nothing. I was just reliving my childhood; talking about some of my favorite TV shows and films. The only way to get to the bottom of this is to wait until somebody does a study on it... Wait a minute?

And there's your answer?

But, it gets worse.


Here's some fun who's hot/who's not links on this most interesting of topics:

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