Hello and welcome to a strange new world. You have traveled far through the desert, only to be met time and again by one empty oasis after another. You are lost and alone, wandering, wondering if someone, anyone, knows how you feel. And just when you think you can't go on, and no one could possibly understand your struggle, a hand reaches out to you, lifts you to your feet, and carries you to the promised land. He feeds you knowledge, shelters you from the self-righteous (and the ridiculous), and provides you with the tools you need to survive in this brave new world. You are a stranger in a strange land, but you are not alone. Let him be your guide. Follow closely as you travel together on this adventure of a lifetime. For now, you are a foreigner to "Fatherhood" but soon YOU will be the master of this realm.

"No Man is Expendable!"

This is Fodder 4 Fathers...


For the last few days my wife has been reading me off one email after another wishing her luck with her Mother's Day gift this year. Women are walking up to her on the street, shaking their heads, giving her hugs and saying: "I'm sorry. Maybe this is the year he gets you what you deserve."  Well, I'm proud to say that this year I am well ahead of the curve...thank-you very much.

Dylan (my 14-month-old daughter) and I were at the mall this evening picking my lovely wife up a few gifts that we hope (fingers crossed) will more than make up for the fiasco from last year. However, if she doesn't "like" (as in please "like"our Facebook page) what we got, my one trump card is I didn't pick out a single thing- I let my daughter choose everything, from the card to the wrapping paper.

So, see if you can yell at me now! Uh-hunh.

And, there you have it. You are now all updated.You no longer have to console my wife on the street, or in the grocery store, or the nail salon, or the  park. I got it covered. It's all been 'handled.'

Wait? What's the date? May 6th? Damn!!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!!! Sorry I didn't get you a present.... My wife was so preoccupied with Mother's Day that she forgot to remind me.

Oh sh@#... your Mother's Day present??? Um. Ya....

Can I make it up to you next year?

(Kill me now).

Just a friendly reminder not to forget to buy your wife a Mother's Day present... or else!

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