Hello and welcome to a strange new world. You have traveled far through the desert, only to be met time and again by one empty oasis after another. You are lost and alone, wandering, wondering if someone, anyone, knows how you feel. And just when you think you can't go on, and no one could possibly understand your struggle, a hand reaches out to you, lifts you to your feet, and carries you to the promised land. He feeds you knowledge, shelters you from the self-righteous (and the ridiculous), and provides you with the tools you need to survive in this brave new world. You are a stranger in a strange land, but you are not alone. Let him be your guide. Follow closely as you travel together on this adventure of a lifetime. For now, you are a foreigner to "Fatherhood" but soon YOU will be the master of this realm.

"No Man is Expendable!"

This is Fodder 4 Fathers...


Okay, so he's not a very good role model, but given time he came around and stepped up for his kid. Sure he helped put the galaxy under the control of a dictator only slightly less handsome than Manuel Noriega. Sure he sliced off his kid's hand with a light saber (but it cauterized really fast). Sure his naivety helped to kill his wife, put himself on life support (it's essentially what it is), and orphan his kids...but he's still an all around good guy... under that evil archetype exterior.

So here's to you Darth Vader (as voiced by James Earl Jones, brought to life by David Prowse, and unmasked to be british actor Sebastian Shaw- before Lucas Bastardized the original films by replacing Shaw's face with Hayden Christensen's) - for coming out of your twenty-something year coma and realizing that being a dad was more important than ruling the universe. Also, thank you for this heart warming scene, and the one that follows, as seeing as most of us never saw our Yuppy Dad's as they were too busy working, golfing, or shtupping the secretary, this is possibly the last fond memory many of us have of our childhood (as sad as that is) and possibly the best example of what a real father/son relationship should look like. It makes me want to cry, just looking at it... or, at the very least, kick some Imperial ass.

So here's to you, Darth "Lord" Vader, our 4th Father of the Week. May you rest in peace... unless George Lucas isn't finished ruining your legacy as yet. (All I can say is just be happy I didn't go the Chewbacca route and pull out that footage of the Star Wars/Wookie Family X-mas Special, circa 1979...whoops).

(And, Hayden Christensen, don't let anyone slag your acting...we all know that to play Mark Hamill's dad you had to play up the whin-y-ness. What am I saying? You're both horrible actors).

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